Mamma's Got A Woody

I sit before the computer contemplating some clever topic for a blog. Evil Baritones can't be creative all the time. We're very busy planning to take over the world. Goonie bursts into the room. Goonie: Daddy, did you know Mamma’s got a Woody? Me: I... I beg your pardon? Goonie: Have you seen Mamma’s Woody? Me: Uh, no. No I didn’t. Tell me about Mamma’s woody. Goonie: I gave her a Woody. C’mon! Let’s go see it! Goonie drags me into the living room where Evil Mezzo is performing yoga along with a DVD. She is in the Down Dog position along with a beautiful blonde who is issuing calming instructions from the TV. Not the best time to be talking about Woody in front of daddy. Goonie: Mamma, show Daddy your Woody! Evil Mezzo: Oh, yeah. I meant to show you my Woody two days ago and I forgot. Me: You’ve had a woody for two days and you didn’t tell me? Evil Mezzo: Yeah, Goonie gave me a Woody a few days ago. Here, look. With that, Evil Mezzo stand erect and lifts the lower left leg of her sweats. There, a temporary tattoo of Sheriff Woody from Pixar’s “Toy Story” smiles back at me. I release a big sigh of relief. Me: Oh……! Whattya know! It’s Sheriff Woody! Goonie: Yeah, Daddy. I told you. Do you want me to give you a Woody, too? Me: NO! I mean, no, Sweetheart, but thanks. Evil Mezzo: You’re gonna blog about this, aren’t you. Me: (Smirking) You bet your Woody.